Are You Ready?
A young man of only 35 years was driving to work, got into a traffic accident and instantly died. When he was greeted by angels, he started complaining and queried how could this happen to him, he being so young and all that. He demanded to send him back home as he had not yet lived his life, and had yet to see lot of things. This must be a mistake . . . blah, blah, blah. He was told no, his time was up, and he could not be sent back. He began to beg and plead and finally requested that if he could be sent back for just two minutes. He was asked what was it that he wanted to do in such a short time. He said, “I have to erase my hard drive.”
This was a joke but everybody has to die. Almost everybody who survives hazards such as accidents, homicide, suicide, etc, eventually die from senescence. From different causes, roughly 150,000 people die around the world each day. Physiological death is now seen as a process, more than an event: conditions once considered indicative of death are now reversible. Where in the process a dividing line is drawn between life and death depends on factors beyond the presence or absence of vital signs.
In general, clinical death is neither necessary nor sufficient for a determination of legal death. A patient with working heart and lungs determined to be brain dead can be pronounced legally dead without clinical death occurring. Paradoxically, as scientific knowledge and medicine advance, a precise medical definition of death has become complex.
Death is Nothing at All
I have only slipped away to the next room.
I am I and you are you.
Whatever we were to each other,
That, we still are. Call me by my old familiar name.
Speak to me in the easy way
which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed
at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me. Pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word
that it always was.
Let it be spoken without effect.
Without the trace of a shadow on it. Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same that it ever was.
There is absolute unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind
because I am out of sight? I am but waiting for you.
For an interval.
Somewhere. Very near.
Just around the corner. All is well.
Plan for death
Any day can be the last day of a living person but none of us like to think about death and dying, let alone talk about it with our loved ones. This unspoken taboo is backed up by statistics that seem to indicate that 70% of American adults do not have wills, with 66% of them never having discussed burial arrangements. None of us want to think about dying, but death will happen to all of us sooner or later.
For most of us, the concept of “later” often results in many of us putting off decisions or expressing last wishes that really should be discussed now. Planning for our death saves a bereaved family from having to second guess our intent. Planning for your death now is NOT “tempting fate” and won’t result in a premature death due to bad luck. It is however a sensible approach that will help a grieving family make it through this difficult time without having to guess what your final intentions might have been.
When dear and near one die unexpectedly, they left behind a bit of a mess. Deceased families while dealing with grief have to deal with perplexing questions, and often fight over what the deceased would have wished or preferred..Is there a will? If so where is it? What was his/her last wishes? How & where he/she wants to be buried? How the assets to be dealt with? What and where are they? Is there a loan? Who should be informed?
Drawing up a will
Planning your death begins with drawing up a will which is a legal document that states how you want your personal possessions and property to be disposed of after your death. Without a will, the state decides how your property is to be disposed of which might be totally different than what you had in mind, and often waste the assets in legal fee, and administration, etc.
Wills typically include such things as who will be the executor of the estate, who cares for any minor children and how will they be supported, how the decedent wishes to be buried, and how personal possessions are to be distributed. It may even make provisions for pets, organ transplants, or bequeaths to local charities. While there are do it yourself kits for preparing a will, in order to make sure that the will is valid, it’s best to seek the advice of an attorney. Equally important is to place the name of your attorney in your desk or in some location where the family can find it in the event of sudden death.
Organizing & updating beneficiary information
The beneficiary is the person that one names to receive his/her financial assets upon death. These assets can include such things as bank accounts, savings bonds, pensions, stocks, retirement funds, and life insurance policies. A list of these assets along with contact information for your broker, banker, benefits office at your place of employment, the number of your safe deposit box, and financial attorney or planner should also be kept in the desk drawer along with these account numbers.
As important as it is to document these assets so they can be located after your death, updating the beneficiary of these assets is equally important. Beneficiary names that are old and outdated could mean that someone else may receive funds that you had intended for your spouse and/or children. Updating your beneficiaries is an important step in safe guarding their security.
Making Information available to help survivors
It is important that all financial or personal information is available with your spouse, or to a first responder in the family. It is preferred if it is written down, and stored the information in a safe place. This information should include such things as where the key to your safe deposit box is hidden; where you’ve hidden cash around the house; emails, eBay and/or Paypal account passwords; how to retrieve on-line income; safe or padlock combinations; and names & addresses of close relatives, passwords to social media accounts like emails, linked in, Facebook, Twitter, etc.
Prepare the information to pass on
When my mother in law recently died, all her children were in state of denial and were saying no she will be back. her father was also back after several hours, etc. I stepped in, got their phone book and started calling relatives. In the event of death, closest relatives may be in state of shock or panic and may not be able to communicate properly and to the appropriate people. Important communications like Obituary, email communiqué, Face book or Linked in message, must be prepared and kept with all other information.
Obituaries are normally prepared by funeral houses or can be written with the help available on line at: http://www.obituaryguide.com/writingtips.php. Following may be the draft for email and social media accounts.
“I am………….(spouse/son/daughter/brother/sister) of ……………… (deceased). He/she passed on today at………..(time). Funeral will be held at ……(time), …………..(location).
No one will be reading any message sent to this account. Please send condolences or any other information at following emails or phone # …………………….(list names. Phone number and email addresses of all survivors).”
This draft should be kept with passwords of all accounts.
FIRST AND LAST CHANCE
My cousin died few years ago. A week before death he emailed this poem to everybody. The poem tell us that this is the only chance to do the right thing. And time to act is now….There will be no chance to clean the hard drive, after the fact.A day starts……..and ends Night comes ……….and goes And the life passes…………… Child, young, old, woman, man, all Planning the future, or even not planning Everyone is engaged in its own commitment This Life – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – — Is a moment to act, given by Allah An option ——First and Last !!! On judgment day……………………………………………………….. Slave (of Allah) will ask – O Allah give me another chance Send me to the World…………………………………………. Allah will say No, Not again, again u will do the same. This, First and Last Chance – of life Use it with sense and consideration Don’t waste +++++++++++++++++++ We know the Right and the Wrong, the evil and the recompense We should not go after self-desire. With the capital of right faith and good deed We should face Allah. (Still there is time to hold) In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.